From Blob to Baby

As of yesterday, Ian is 11 weeks old.  For the math-challenged among you, that means that I gave birth to him 78 days ago.  He's only been alive for 78 days!  A pretty short time when you think of it that way, isn't it?  (Of course, it's a pretty long time when you think about it in terms of the whole "it's okay that my jeans don't fit, cause I just had this precious BABY a few days ago!" thing.  Let's be honest, I'll still be using that excuse when Ian is 17.)

As those of us who've been to this party before know, the first few weeks sort of eek by in a sleep-deprived haze of diapers ("If the line is green, does that mean it's wet or dry??"), poop (you never realize how much your life could revolve around poop until you have a newborn--it may be trite, but it's true), pee (for heaven's sake, how am I supposed to keep track of how many flipping PEE diapers that child has every day?) boobs (and not in the fun way), gross little belly button nubs (we never did find Ian's...), and, for the lucky boy-moms among us, circumcision care ("I'm calling the doctor.  There is absolutely no way that thing is supposed to look like that when it falls off."). 

But then one day you wake up and your squawking, squirming little blob of an infant has turned into a smiling, happy, cute, real-life BABY.  Right before your very eyes!  And yet somehow it manages to slip past you until it knocks you over your head.  You realize that every parent you've ever met is completely right: this whole thing is gonna go by way, way too fast (incidentally, that's another reason why I blog). 

Anyway, I had this "Oh S!" moment a couple of days ago.  Ian is growing up.  Fast.  And here's some video to prove it.

He LAUGHED for the first time today.  Real live laughter!  And since I've been in super-sappy "my baby is growing up too fast, sniff sniff" mode for the last few days, I actually happened to catch it on camera.  So, here, it is, a very momentous video for a new mom: Ian's first laugh ever.  On camera.  (Please ignore the terrible camera work; it's hard to stimulate laughter and videotape it at the same time.  You try.  Anyway, just turn up the volume and listen!  At about the 0:20 mark for the impatient among you.)

Pretty sure I get the Good Mom of the Week award for catching this on video.

Of course, Danielle and I spent the afternoon after that trying to get him to do it again.  We joke that we feel a ridiculous sense of accomplishment when we make these kids laugh - why is that?  But truly, the best is when they laugh at themselves.  Here's a combo of the two (again, forgive the horrendous upside down camera work).

Super cute baby laughs.  I hope they made you smile.  If not, try this one -- even Osama bin Laden couldn't watch this laughter without smiling.

More progress From Blob to Baby: Ian's also been sitting up really well lately.  Probably because he screams bloody murder if we try to do tummy time, so we just sit him up to get him off his back and give those hairs on the back of his head a chance to grow.  So the pediatrician will believe me when I say, "Oh yes, he loves tummy time.  60 minutes a day, mmhmm, yep, of course!"  Don't judge, it works.  He won't ever crawl, but he will be a champ at sitting.

Anyway, here's a video of him propped up in his Bumbo - but I think the coolest thing is how into Charlie he is.  And how he is learning that your head can only go so far in each direction, hah.

So my sweet little blob Ian is officially a baby.  Before I know it he'll be a toddler, running around terrorizing us all just like his big brother - but this time, there will be two of them.  God help us.

Oh Hai!

About Joe

Any of you who have met Joe know that he's generally a pretty shy, reserved kid.  He doesn't usually run around crazily or bounce off the walls; he's way too particular for all that mess.  His favorite things to do are mostly to move puzzle pieces into and out of puzzles, and stack things.  Exhibit A.

Stacking and un-stacking these containers kept Joe busy for an hour this morning.

Don't get me wrong, he still has the attention span of a stressed-out flea - he just doesn't need to put on a big show about it.  His chillness even goes so far that his preschool teachers all told me that they were shocked and excited to see him laughing and playing with a ball one day in school, and that they wished they had a camera because he never shows that much emotion.  A little odd?  Maybe, but he's just a super introvert.  Usually.

Well, none of you have met Crazy Bathtime Man, one of my sweet, meticulous Joe's alternate personalities.  Crazy Bathtime Man will make an special guest appearance in a later post, once I'm able to capture his full insanity on camera. But here's a sneak preview.

Yesterday, we busted out the ol' Bumbo, since Ian will be ready to use it before we know it. Remember how Joe couldn't fit into it back when he was a baby? Well, turns out he just needed to get a little more proportional. 

Ultra-safe Bumbo bedsitting session with Crazy Bathtime Man.  What's even safer is that he was bouncing back and forth on it while it was on the bed, which you can kind of see from the picture on the left.  So glad I was snapping photos instead of protecting him from the inevitable fall.

I got him to stand still just long enough to take this photo, then he was back off to the races. 

By the way, can you tell how badly he needs a haircut? We are in serious bowl cut + mullet city these days. Sorry Joe. 

More on Crazy Bathtime Man in the future.

The Making of: Ian

One of my friends posted a comment on Facebook the other day questioning why people spend time blogging when they could be out living their lives.  And someone commenting on her post even went so far as to say that people who blog are "spectators in their own lives."  Ouch!

Well, I can't speak for anyone else, but I know exactly why I blog (well, why I have started to blog again).  Other than the fact that there isn't much "out living your life" when you're the parent of two kids under two.  But, I don't blog for you, reader (sorry!  I still appreciate that you're reading!), and really, I don't do it for me.  I blog because I want my kids to know what their life was like before they could remember it.  Who doesn't love to flip through their parents' picture albums and see what they looked like when they were little?  I think it's cool to take it even a step further and do a little play-by-play of their first years for them.  So they can look back in 20 years and roll their eyes at how ridiculous it was to worry about X or write about Y.  Future Joe and Future Ian (and Future Other Babies), I hope you enjoy.

Anyway, this one's for you, Ian.  Here's my pregnancy with you, in a nutshell.  (Joe, go back a few posts and you'll see yours.)

Month 1: November

John and I wanted to have our first two kids really close together, but we had to wait for a few things.  First, we wanted to buy a house.  Check.  Second, we wanted to get a little more established in our jobs.  Check.  Third -- here comes the TMI part -- I needed to get a colonoscopy before I got pregnant again.  Most of you probably know that my dad passed away of colon cancer in June of this year.  Most of you probably don't know that my mom was diagnosed with colon cancer when she was in her early thirties (I was 4.  Matt was 5.) - reality check, right?  Anyway, she's fine now and has been for many years.  But I decided not to take any chances.  If colon cancer is in your family, doctors recommend your first colonoscopy when you are a decade younger than the age when your first parent was diagnosed.  All went well with the test, so preggers I got.

(Sidenote: My colon doctor lady turned out to have dated someone who worked at my firm.  So she knew just about EVERYONE in my office.  Cool.)

Month 2: December

Merry Christmas!  Feeling fine and, other than tiredness, very un-pregnant.











Month 3: January

Joe's first birthday!  Still feeling great.  Ian, I felt you move toward the end of this month.  Since this was about two or three months before I felt Joe move, this was my first inkling that you would be a more...shall we say, active child than Joe.  You're only 10 weeks old right now, but so far my first inkling has been proven correct.



Month 4: February

Already getting bigger (woohoo, second baby).  Fun girls' trip this month to Denver to visit one of my best friends (Jen) for my other best friend's (Meghan) bachelorette party.  Jen made some awesome german chocolate cupcakes and I provided the non-alcoholic libations. Yummy yum yum.







Month 5: March 

Easter time!  We figured out the kinks in our Easter plans (read: we figured out that it's probably not a great idea to get to the egg hunt site 2 minutes before the hunt is schedule to begin), so you should be much more successful at egg hunting than your brother was.  See?  Second child blessings.  Count them.


Month 6: April
6 months second pregnancy = 9 months first pregnancy.  I was just about done carrying you around 24/7 by now.  Thank goodness I wasn't a teetotaler while you were in there - a glass of wine can solve lots and lots of problems.  You'll understand when you're older.  Also, something you'll understand when you become a parent yourself: neither me nor John can remember for the life of us what we did for my birthday this month.  You kiddos take over our brains.  And our sanity.

Month 7: May
Still pregnant, still huge, but now my adorable, sweet infant Joe has turned into adorable, willful toddler Joe.  Yikes.  Hard to chase around a toddler when your chase is more like a waddle (there was no waddling with Joe.  Woohoo second baby.) -- thank goodness for grandparents!

Speaking of grandparents, your Papa Joe celebrated his 60th birthday this month.  He took your dad to Pebble Beach for a few days to play some serious golf.  Hopefully you and your brother (and any Future Other Babies who are interested) will get to go on a reunion trip for his 70th or 75th birthday!

Month 8: June

Two very momentous things happened this month, within days of each other.  First, your Aunt Kris and Uncle Mike tied the knot.  Actually, my dad (your Gampi) tied the knot for them!  They'd been together for as long as I can remember, but they made it official on June 4, 2011.   Congrats you two. 

You and I are the whale in green in this Lavalley family picture:

The other momentous thing is that my dad (your Gampi) passed away on June 8.  No space for maudlin thoughts here, but know this, sweet Ian: your Gampi already loved you with all of his heart, and would have spoiled you rotten.  


Month 9: July 
What more is there to say?  I was completely hugely pregnant.  You were big.  I was tired.  Joe was rambunctious.  I'm tired just remembering it.  And - no pictures this of me month.  Hopefully you understand; I was as big as a house.  But here's your brother, on his last night as an only child!




Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Thank goodness for inductions.  I had been having contractions for weeks at this point (real contractions, not those fake ones.  they hurt.  feel bad for me.).  Here comes more TMI - by the day you were induced, I had been dilated to 4cm for more than two weeks.  Think about that please.  I walked around, went to work, and tried to be civil to people for two weeks.  While I was dilated.  To 4cm.

But my lovely doctor was willing to induce a week before your due date (you were due July 20).  Your Gammi was concerned about you being born on the 13th, since a bunch of your birthdays would fall on Friday the 13th, and she wanted me to push the induction to the 14th.  I, on the other hand, was significantly more concerned about having you out of my stomach.  I told Gammi that if she wanted to wait until the 14th to induce, she could carry you around that extra day.  So, if you have had some sort of 13th-related bad luck issues your whole life, my sincere apologies.


So here's what happened on your first day in this world.  Danielle, Joe's Nana (and yours for awhile!), came over Tuesday night and hung out with us while we got our last bags packed.  She stayed overnight to watch Joe in the morning, cause Dad and I had to leave for the hospital at about 5:30am.  We got to Baylor in Dallas at about 6:00am, and the drugs started doing their thing around 7:00am.  Dad and I chatted, watched some women's World Cup soccer (semifinals - we won!), and around 11:30am I sent Dad to get some lunch for himself.  Around 11:32am, the doctor came in and said I was ready to start pushing.  With no Dad, no Gammi - no one but me and you!  Fortunately, my doctor wasn't at the hospital yet, so we had enough time to at least get Dad in there.  So, push once, push twice, and out you came.  Second baby, WOOHOO!  You had a small little head, but huge gangly feet.  Is that still true?

Ian Jerome Kane, born July 13, 2011, at 13:10.  Dad and I exchanged a knowing look about that birth time - ask us about it some day.  Let's just say we thought it was fantastic karma.

My Loves: Michelin and Staypuft

Ian had his two month doctor's appointment yesterday.  Where, incidentally, I walked in with a cell phone but out without one.  So some ritzy Highland Park toddler has an awesome new iPhone 4 that mommy pretended not to watch him swipe.  Grr.

But, sigh, that's neither here nor there. The doctor told us that Ian is perfectly healthy and happy.  Funny how reassuring an uneventful doctor's appointment can be.

Anyway, going through all these baby milestones with Ian, I can't help but compare everything to my experience with Joe.  From my perspective, they are completely different kids, in every way you could think to list - looks, personality, baby-type skeelz, everything.  But most people who see Ian always express shock at how different he looks from Joe.  Which I sort of understand, since Joe's blonde hair and blue eyes are pretty milkman for our family. 

But really, Ian really looks a whole lot like Joe did at this age.

Joe at about Ian's age (by the way, see that blanket to his left?  in bed with him every night now.) 

 

 

Ian at about Ian's age

Okay, they aren't twins.  This may not be the best picture of Ian to use, since Joe still doesn't smile this much.  But gimme a break, my phone got stolen, I don't have many options.  Mostly I just wanted to show that Joe had dark hair and dark eyes for quite awhile.  So, success.

But the way my two perfect little boys are the same: they are huge babies.  Both were above the 95th percentile height and weight at this age.   I feel most of your eyes glazing over when you see the word "percentile."  Mommy talk alert.  But think about it: that means that more than 95% of babies Ian's age are smaller than him.  Or, think about it the way I do nowadays: 95% of moms are lugging significantly less weight into Market Street and Target every day than I am.  Ouch.  John's aunt Katy put it best: they are my little Michelin and Staypuft men.  Yum.

(Joe, by the way, isn't huge anymore -- he's about the 75th/85th percentiles now.  Coincidentally, this shift began right around the time he could walk.  Or, putting it differently, it began right around the time I didn't have to lug him everywhere anymore.  Typical.)

So Joe and Ian are both fluffy.  But, to me, that's where the similarities stop.  Point: I'm already learning what all parents of multiples say.  Each kid is so, so different from the others.  Sometimes it's easy to think you're a pro at being a parent (at least of a newborn) because you've already done it once.  But the fact is that each kid has totally different needs, totally different desires, totally different interactions with you -- basically, each kid is completely unique.  Already, Ian's personality is becoming clear.  Joe is my little shy, coy introvert.  I think Ian is going to be his total foil - an outgoing, troublesome little thunderstorm (as John likes to call him).  Here's to hoping.

The Toughest Part of the Job

It's pretty much impossible not to notice that just about everyone seems to be pregnant these days. Scrolling through Facebook, it seems like you can't help but see at least 1 new baby, 2 sonogram pictures, and 3 pregnancy announcements every day. Including the beautiful Lyons and Lavalley girls that will be expanding my family before we know it! I'm so happy to see all these new families starting, and I'm excited to see all these new moms and dads embarking on the best, coolest, most important job there is.

Seeing all the new parents all around (myself included!) has me thinking about my kiddos, and how exhilarating and exhausting the last couple of years have been. John and I have been fortunate enough to have two easy and healthy pregnancies, two happy and healthy baby boys, and an incredibly loving and supportive family. We are eternally grateful for these blessings, and try to remind ourselves daily not to take our good fortune for granted.

Lately, though, we've started to get pretty concerned about Joe. He's almost 20 months old, and he doesn't have a single word yet - not even "mama" or "dada," which most babies are proficient at by the time they're about a year old. And he doesn't babble or talk at all (and never has)...in fact, he's almost completely silent the vast majority of the time. He speaks his own version of sign language, and has gotten to the point where he can communicate virtually anything he needs with his hands. For over a year now, the only sound Joe has even attempted to make is "yaya" -- cute for a one year old, but rather concerning for an almost-two year old.

I know what most of you who are already moms are probably thinking: "He's a boy, he's a first child, and he hasn't been in day care, so give the kid a break! Things will work themselves out, just give the poor baby a chance." Or the ever so lovely: "With two lawyers in the family, it's probably just that he can't get a word in edgewise!" Essentially: "Chill out, all kids talk eventually!" But the doctor put it best when he said that those are all excuses we can make after Joe gets where he needs to be. We would be doing a disservice to Joe to laugh this off. In 20 years, Joe can make fun of us for being worried about him, but today, we have to start taking some action.

So, for all you new parents out there, I'll share with you my recent discovery. As it turns out, the hardest part about being a parent is not the sleepless nights, the fear that they will suffocate on their blankets in the crib, or the ridiculously expensive cost of diapers, day care, college, and weddings. The hardest part about being a parent is admitting that something may be off with your kid, the kid that you are genetically predispositioned to consider absolutely perfect from the moment you first see their little profile on the sonogram picture. And the second hardest part is eliminating all the advice, recommendations, "tsks tsks," and just plain noise that everyone else has to offer, and figuring out what's best for your kid.

Yes, kids do things on their own timelines. Yes, Joe is pretty young for us to be worried about his complete lack of vocabulary. And yes, Joe would probably talk on his own at some point of we ignored the problem. But John and I know our son. We see him pointing to every single object in every single book and wanting to know what it's called, but not even attempting to say the word himself. We see him getting frustrated when he can't communicate with us. And we see his little brain trying, trying, trying to say certain easy words, but his mouth never quite getting past "yaya."

So, enough. We head to our first speech therapy appointment tomorrow. Hopefully soon I'll be posting videos of Joe babbling his brains out. But, for now, adorable pictures and silent movies will have to do!

We're Back!

Good evening loyal blog readers! Well, okay, good evening blog readers. How could anyone expect you be loyal to a blog that no one posts to?

Well, the days of no-posting are over, friends! Today, when I accidentally clicked the link to our blog instead of my usual "People.com" bookmark, I noticed that the last time I posted to the blog was right after Joe was baptized in May. Of 2010! Then, in a weird and cosmically-motivated turn of events, today in the mail I happened to receive a CD with the pictures my mother-in-law took at Ian's christening a couple of weeks ago. This, along with my realization that my mom and dad have both blogged more recently than I have (both shocking and embarrassing news!) made me realize that I should start keeping up with our family's blog again. Because, hey, you care, right?

So, I'm back. It's too late to start a full post tonight, but for the sake of continuity, here are some pictures of Ian's baptism.



The theme of the day: not surprisingly, babies! Both of Ian's godparents, John's sister Mary and my brother Matt, are expecting their own little ones soon. Mary's daughter is due in a few days, and Matt's daughter is due in January. Finally, some girls to make the grandmothers happy!




















Thanks to all our friends and family who made it out for the occasion. Your support means the world to us!